You Know You’re a Homeschool Mom When…

• You ask for a copier instead of a diamond bracelet for a wedding anniversary gift… and you get it.
• A potholder doubles as a bookmark in a pinch.
• Your kids think that reading history is best accomplished while lying on the floor with their head resting on the side of their patient dog.
• Your husband comes home from work and can tell how the science experiment went just by looking at the house.
• The only debate about the school lunch program is whose turn it is to cook.
• Your formal dining room now has a computer, copy machine, and many bookshelves and there are posters and maps all over the walls.
• You have meal worms growing in a container… on purpose.
• If you get caught talking to yourself you can claim you are having a PTA meeting.
• Talking out loud to yourself is a parent/teacher conference.
• You take off for a teacher in service day because the principal needs clean underwear.
• You step on math manipulatives on your way to the bathroom.
• The teacher gets to kiss the principal in the faculty lounge… and no one gossips.
• Your kids think of the neighbors’ kids are “government school inmates”.
• You live in a one-room schoolroom.

Pray for America! Pray for our world!

The world is changing!  What was once a whispered threat is now a daily reality.  The World Trade Center is now “ground zero.”  Scores dead in Palestine daily.  Missionaries held hostage.  Grieving families.  Violence in every corner.  Missing children.

Jesus said, “In this world you will have trouble.  But take heart!  I have overcome the world” (John 16:33).  In a matter of hours, Jesus would show His followers how He was to overcome: through the cross, death, burial.  All that we fear, He faced in that moment of history we call the crucifixion:

You see it was one man against in the night
Taking on a multitude that had left Him high and dry
No candle burning vigil could light the way
Darkness hit the ground like a fallen satellite
He wrestled until morning with human souls and dark angels
And there He finished His work
On the third day.
(“Alas My Love…,” from dc Talk’s Jesus Freak CD)

On the third day, the tomb where Jesus was laid was empty.  The heavenly messenger proclaimed, “Do not be afraid, for I know that you are looking for Jesus, who was crucified.  “He is not here; He has risen, just as He said” (Matthew 28:5,6).  He faced it all and overcame, triumphant over the “human souls and dark angels,” over death and sin.

His resurrection is celebrated every Sunday by believers all over the world.  Jesus extends to those who trust in Him an overcoming hope, a peace that passes all understanding, an undying relationship purchased by His own sacrifice.

Pray for America.  Pray for the world.  Pray that all would know personally that Jesus has overcome it all.

1 April 2002

Top Signs You’ve Had TOO Much Of The 90′s….

15. You try to enter your password on the microwave.
14. You’ve NEVER played solitaire with a real deck of cards.
13. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
12. You e-mail your son in his room to tell him that dinner is ready, and he e-mails you back “What’s for dinner?”
11. Your daughter sells Girl Scout Cookies via her web site.
10. You chat several times a day with a stranger from South Africa, but haven’t spoken to your next-door neighbor yet this year.
9. Your daughter just bought on CD all the records your college roommate used to play that you most despised.
8. Every commercial on television has a website address at the bottom of the screen.
7. You buy a computer and a week later it is out of date. And now sells for half the price you paid.
6. The concept of using real money, instead of credit or debit, to make a purchase is foreign to you.
5. Cleaning up the dining area means getting the fast food bags out of the back seat of your car.
4. Your reason for not staying in touch with family is that they do not have e-mail addresses.
3. You consider 2nd day air delivery painfully slow.
2. You refer to your dining room table as the flat filing cabinet.

And the #1 sign that you’ve had too much of the ’90s…
1. You hear most of your jokes via e-mail instead of in person.

Wirehead’s Note:  I would love to give credit where credit is due for this bit of humor, but I received this by e-mail, and you should see the headers on that baby!   If anyone finds out the source of this bit o’ humor, email the Webmaster!

Don’t Look At Your Calendar, It’s Almost….

Halloween. There was a time when October 31 seemed like a harmless holiday that would only worry the sugar-challenged.  No more!  Not long ago, our memories of Halloween were Charlie Brown in a badly-cut ghost costume–and bag full of rocks.  Now we have Freddy Krueger, that Scream mask, Trench Coat Mafia, etc., etc.–and a bag full of what could be deadly.Let’s talk roots.  Way back when, some folks called the Druids had a new year’s festival called Samhain.  As pagans they worshiped things in creation like the sun.   Since the days were growing shorter, the “sun god” was thought to be dying.  So their celebration turned to thoughts of death, the dead, the shadowy spirit world.  They celebrated on the eve of Samhain–October 31.  More: http://www.the-spa.com/lily1013/samhain/origins.html

When the Gospel of Jesus Christ finally arrived to the Druids, much of the celebration remained as it was.  It was, unfortunately, “Christianized.”   Samhain became “All Saints’ Day,” and the eve before became, of course, Halloween–”All Hallows’ Eve.”

Echoes remain of the Druids’ times today: cemeteries and spirits in front yards, haunted houses, ghosts and goblins roaming the dark suburban streets.  Our celebration makes all this sound so harmless, but paganism is alive and well today.   I dare you to do a web search on “Samhain”–it is still a revered holiday (“holy day”) to many.

So, what does a conscientious family do when October 31 rolls around?  A few suggestions:

1. Celebrate life. Death is a part of life, so there’s no need to run from it.  Dwelling on it is another matter altogether.  Why not focus on the One who gives life?  Jesus said, “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full” (John 10:10).  Even in death, Jesus gives life to those who have trusted in Him: “whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life” (John 3:16).  Celebrate Jesus, and you celebrate life!

2. Focus on the season. Instead of dwelling on gods, goddesses, spirits, and the dead, focus on the season: harvest time, autumn, hay rides, fall fruits.   Be thankful instead to the God of creation, who said, “As long as the earth endures, seedtime and harvest, cold and heat, summer and winter, day and night will never cease” (Genesis 8:22).

3. Be positive. Don’t down Halloween or those with the faux cemeteries in their front yard.  Instead, offer a positive alternative.  Have a Fall Festival or Harvest Party.  Celebrate life, focus on the season.  Don’t focus on what’s wrong, but what’s right.

4. Look for opportunities. Remember, Halloween is just a sign that our society needs the truth about life and death–we tend to trivialize or toy with our insecurities.  Why not take the opportunity to spread some truth?  When a little ghoul or goblin knocks on the door, give him or her or it a piece of fresh fruit along with a little booklet containing the Gospel.  Have a Fall Festival at church, where families can have fun safely and hear the Gospel.  Some churches even host a “judgment house”: each “room” depicts the judgment every person faces before the God of creation, and that the only escape is Jesus Christ.

5. Don’t “Christianize” Halloween. It’s easy to take as much “bad” out of something to make it palatable to those with Christian persuasions.   Unfortunately, the thing usually remains unprofitable for real faith.  The bottom line of the Gospel is a transformed life: “If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come” (2 Corinthians 5:17)!  Jesus changes lives.  Make that evident in everything you do!

In 1999, Halloween falls on Sunday.  We’re having a Fall Festival at our church, thanking Almighty God for all He has made, the season He is bringing, and the life He gives even as winter approaches.  Kids will dress up in non-scary costumes, play games, eat hot dogs, get candy–and hear about Jesus, who said: “I am the Living One; I was dead, and behold I am alive for ever and ever! And I hold the keys of death and Hades” (Revelation 1:18).  As for me and my house, we stand with the One with all the keys.

October 5, 1999

Goodbye, Raspberry

Stoutsite marks the passing of a dear friend, one you could find in our pitchers, in our freezer in those little trays you used to have before ice makers, in sticky reddish-purple puddles behind kitchen appliances.  That’s right, raspberry-flavored Kool-Aid.  But now you won’t find it on your grocer’s shelves.  It wasn’t popular enough.  Kids don’t go for “raspberry” or “cherry” anymore–they’re into “slammin’ strawberry kiwi” or “oh-yeah orange pineapple.”  Sounds like you risk injury if you drink it.

OK, just in case you feel like we do, send an e-mail to the fine folks at Kraft foods: http://www.kraftfoods.com/html/email/email.html
Who knows?  Some purposeful positive peer pressure might prevail on public opinion.  Who knows?  If we don’t speak, which flavor will get the axe next?  Cherry?  Grape?

Lemon-Lime should have gone first.

Why We Don’t Use Mindspring

The Stouts used to use MindSpring as our Internet Service Provider (our on-ramp to the World Wide Web). But then, we learned about a business deal they made, and as a matter of principle had to discontinue service with them.

We believe internet pornography is a scourge. Since MindSpring now encourages access to “cyberporn,” we could no longer send money to the company each month. I hope other families feel as we do, and will do what they can to support porn-free surfing.

Please read the following article dated Oct. 27, 1998:

Playboy teams with MindSpring
By Janet Kornblum Staff Writer, CNET News.com
October 27, 1998, 1:10 p.m. PT

Playboy is joining ranks with Internet service provider MindSpring to launch a new cobranded Internet access service. The service will launch December 1 and subscribers will pay the standard $19.95 a month for unlimited Internet access. Subscribers also will receive a free two-month membership to the Playboy Cyber Club. The deal is similar to many that have been cut between portal sites and Internet access providers. AT&T, for example, provides access for several portals, including leading brand Yahoo. The Playboy and MindSpring partnership allows companies to provide complete online services–with access and content–by simply joining together, rather than by trying to do it all on their own as services like America Online and Prodigy did. Under today’s deal, Playboy, one of the most successful Net subscription properties, will receive a bounty payment from MindSpring for each subscription to the service. “Playboy Online’s financial strategy relies on growing all three of the business’ revenue streams: e-commerce, advertising, and subscriptions,” Christie A. Hefner, chairman and chief executive officer of Playboy Enterprises, said in a written statement. “This alliance with MindSpring enables us to drive subscriptions to Playboy Cyber Club and receive bounty revenues for subscriptions to this cobranded service, while incurring little additional marketing expense.” The cobranded site will be available at both Playboy’s and MindSpring’s home pages.

Wirehead’s note: After finding out about this deal, we moved StoutSite to NETCOM, another internet service provider. Guess who bought NETCOM: MindSpring! A fellow wirehead at church informed me of this. So what did we do? We use another provider–and hope MindSpring doesn’t gobble them up. By the way, since we registered our own domain name–STOUTSITE.COM–anyone can service it. Our web pages and e-mail follow along. So we can pick any internet service provider we want–even if that means putting a web server with a T-1 line in the living room…. –June 25, 1999